Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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