So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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