Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Randomize
