You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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