the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
high people should be assigned attendants
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
