I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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