Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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