my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
