oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
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