idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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