Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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