She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
