Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize