yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she peed on how many people?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize