My nipple is on Facebook.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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