Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
