I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize