if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
