We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Randomize
