My brain says no but my pants say off.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
