so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
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There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
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