Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Randomize
