Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Randomize