Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
