He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
