Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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