we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
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I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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