Where did you get a picture of my penis
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
The struggles of a small town man whore
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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