I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
