Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
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After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.