didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
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he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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