I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I think my vagina is haunted
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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