and she was petting her beer can
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
