Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
