pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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