First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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