I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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