im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
