Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
