I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize