is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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