So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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