Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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