i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.