How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
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