It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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