I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
