Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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