There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize