So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
