And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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